
Article by
Richard
Evans-Lacey:
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the humanHi psychological health & fitness ...
When I was about 8 years old I was the only one not to bow my head in assembly when we were told ‘let us pray’. I felt embarrassed at being the odd one out and yet I forced myself to go against the tide do what I thought was right. At the time I just couldn’t work out how the stories I had lapped up like everyone else at Sunday School related to the other things I was learning: Where were the dinosaurs in the garden of Eden? If God is all powerful and all loving then why is there suffering in the world? If we all ask God to help us come first in the race why do most of us still lose? I just couldn’t reconcile these things in my head and yet, all around me, were people who seemed quite happy to pray to and praise the Lord. They had God, Jesus and each other to keep them company; I was alone.
My feelings of loneliness were compounded by many others over the years. Shame was the one I was best at. Growing up there was a certain event that happened when I was 13 that I couldn’t even think about – let alone talk about with my friends or parents. But I coped. I used my intelligence to build a personality for myself. I was right about most things and it was important for me to prove that. I argued my corner passionately; others would loose patience and call me arrogant. Inside I was collapsing and the feelings of isolation were perpetuated.
Time Line Therapy for shame


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